The term "Love Bombing" was coined by Margaret Singer, a psychologist and cult specialist, as cited in a 2017 article on The Guardian titled "Love bombing: how cults use it to recruit and control."
What is love bombing?
Love bombing is a manipulation tactic used by individuals, groups or cults to gain control over someone by overwhelming them with affection, praise, and attention. The objective is to make the target feel special and loved, often resulting in them becoming emotionally dependent on the person or group love bombing them. Over time, the attention and affection may decrease, and the individual or group may manipulate the target to satisfy their own needs or interests. Love bombing can be a form of emotional abuse and can have long-lasting negative effects on the target's mental health and well-being.
Characteristics That Makes a Person a Susceptible
Love Bombing
Love bombing can affect individuals who are looking for validation or approval from others. They may be vulnerable due to past trauma, low self-esteem, or a lack of social support. Additionally, love bombing can be used as a manipulation tactic by those who are looking to control or exploit others. Therefore, individuals who are prone to trusting others too quickly, are prone to being flattered, and have a history of being mistreated may be more susceptible to love bombing.
Why is Love Bombing A Dangerous Game?
Love bombing can be a problem in a relationship because it involves excessive flattering, attention, and affection during the initial stage of the relationship to win the partner's affection quickly. The love bomber often uses these tactics to fast-track intimacy, commitment, and control over their partner. However, this behavior can be manipulative and a red flag in a relationship. It can create a false sense of security and attachment that might not be healthy in the long run. Additionally, love bombing can set unattainable expectations that the partner might not be able to keep up with, leading to disappointment, resentment, and a decrease in trust.
12 Signs That you Are Being Love Bombed
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Over the top compliments
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Grandiose gestures
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Constant communication
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Quickly moving the relationship forward
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Isolating the person from their support system
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Pushing the person to make quick decisions
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Showering the person with gifts or money
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Making promises that are too good to be true
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Ignoring boundaries or personal space
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Love bombing only when the person is vulnerable
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Making the person feel guilty if they don't reciprocate the same level of affection
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Turning on the person abruptly when they don't meet the love bomber's expectations
How To Escape a Love Bomber
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Acknowledge that the behavior is not healthy: Recognize that the love bombing behavior is not normal or healthy in a relationship. This acknowledgment will help you make the right decision to leave the relationship.
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Set boundaries: Set clear boundaries with the love bomber and make it known that their behavior is not acceptable. You need to communicate your boundaries and expectations to the person and make them understand that their behavior won't be tolerated.
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Take a break or end the relationship: You may need to take a break from the person or end the relationship completely if you feel uncomfortable, suffocated, or pressured by the love bomber's actions. Put your well-being first and make the best decision for yourself.
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Seek support: Don't hesitate to reach out to friends or loved ones for support during this challenging time. Additionally, working with a therapist can help you navigate the complicated emotions that arise when leaving a relationship.
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Stay firm: If the love bomber attempts to lure you back into the relationship by reverting to their old tactics, stay firm in your decision to stay away. Remember that your well-being and mental health come first, and you deserve respect and love that isn't manipulative or controlling.
In conclusion, love bombing remains a dangerous manipulation tactic that can lead to an emotional roller coaster, leading to psychological harm to the person being love bombed. Those who are most susceptible to love bombing are individuals looking for validation and approval from others or those who have experienced past trauma or a lack of social support. It's essential for individuals to recognize the signs of love bombing and take steps to protect themselves, including setting clear boundaries, seeking support, and, if necessary, ending the relationship with the love bomber. The good news is help is available for those experiencing love bombing. A counselor can help a person understand the dynamics of their relationship and provide guidance on how to move forward in a healthy and safe way.
When clients come to Rhea Hill for therapy, they can expect to be in an atmosphere that is supportive, free from judgment, and safe even while they discuss some of life's most delicate issues. Whether you need assistance dealing with the hardships of life, conquering depression or anxiety, or simply need to chat to another woman who understands, together we will discover answers that will lead you towards living your best life!
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